Expectations & Disappointments

When I was young my Dad sometimes tag me along on his long drive going to Paete, Laguna, where he will pick up some handy crafts that will be exported outside the country by their company, he usually bring me or my brother for that long drive, maybe because he needs company, or maybe my Mom wants to make sure that it is a legitimate long drive, all I know, it is so much fun and I always look forward to those long drives, I was 5 years old back then, I was born and raised in the city, not used to see a lot of nature, I was blown away by the scenery.

 

When we arrived to the place where they made the handy crafts, it was lunch time and the family who makes the items invited us to join them to eat, it is a crime to Pilipino culture not to invite visitors to eat with them even if the food is not enough for their own family, so we ate in a boodle fight setting. There was a kid that is the same age as me who doesn’t speak the same language but even we can’t have a conversation we tried our best to communicate, she showed me around, their backyard has a lot of trees that feels like you are entering a forrest, the sun can’t even penetrate the shades. I told her that I feel envy about their rocking chair on the porch, at that age that is my dream to have a rocking chair of my own and I imagine myself staying on it the entire day. During that time I didn’t know if she understands me or not, but I had a great time with her.

 

I always look forward to see my new playmate again, then weeks passed by, my Dad told me that Joy-Joy, that is her name told her dad that she created a rocking chair for me, god I cannot explain how happy I am, knowing that she understood me and she created the chair of my dreams, she cannot wait for me to have it and she will send it when my Dad is back their again. It took almost a month or two before the chair arrives, and boy, you cannot imagine how anticlimactic it is. I was so disappointment when I saw the chair that Joy-Joy made for me, the size was only good for my Barbie doll, I feel cheated and I hated my friend for not being able to deliver my dream chair. I never seen Joy-Joy in my life again, and I never thanked her for the sweetest gesture that she did.

 

This is the earliest disappointment I can remember, and in retrospect I realized, why did I even expect a little girl of the same age can create the rocking chair of my dream? But when I was younger all I know is my friend let me down. This made me ask why do we set expectations from people around us? And when I was five I should have already learned not to expect from other person but here I am now 28 years old and still have a lot of expectations to everyone around me especially my love ones and even with myself but I and everybody seems to continue disappointing me.

 

Maybe acknowledging as they said “expectation is a premeditated resentment” will give us awareness not to expect. Shall I not practice the Law of Attraction because since it is based on expectation? What I know now is expectation will surely be a recipe of disappointment if it is based on conclusion, I’m a believer of the Law of Attraction, and you should take action on what you are expecting, if you want to build your dream house it is not enough just to hire a great architect, sure they can build a house but you have to communicate with them how you want your home to look like, expecting them to draw what you have in your mind without being clear on what you want it will never turn up the way you expected it to be.

 

I will then give labels to my expectations, when I feel disappointed, I shall I ask myself whether I set realistic or unrealistic expectation maybe then I can be more effective on handling outcomes, or if I caught myself ahead of time I can label them while I’m ruminating my expectations if it is realistic or not, maybe then I get to more effective on taking action and in my expectations.